Phoenix Wright: Chaotic Attorney
by marioultrafan
Summary: A load of ship. No shipping though. THE STRATING CONCLUSION.
1. Case 1

The characters and simplified law system of the Ace Attorney series is not owned by me, and this story is a parody of the first game. If you do not like this, I advise you leave. Please keep in mind that I'm a fan of the series, so try not to take this seriously. This message will be copied in every chapter for my own convenience.

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_Alright, first case of the first game. (As you'll notice, I don't do things in detail, nor do I really touch on the whole case in many cases, and this case is especially short and the trial is irrelevant.) I really want you to excuse my memory throughout the writing of this story, but usually if I don't remember something I look it up._

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_CASE 1: The First Turnabout_

_"I've just killed this person. I'm going to face it...I'm a maniac..." said Mr. Sahwit, had just said after realizing he killed Cindy Stone. "Since my new life as a maniac has begun, I have two orders of buisiness...first of all..." he paused, then laughed out a loud laugh. "HA HA HA HA HA, HE HE HOO HAW!!!" He then shook his head and continued. "Now I must frame my misdeed on someone else, like that butt...heh...heh...HA HA HA HE HE...HOO HOO HAW..."_

_-----_

_9:47 AM, Defendant Lobby No. 2_

Now was the beginning of a legacy. The legacy of a certain Phoenix Wright, who was on of the few "sane," as they labeled him. A certain Mia Fey then showed up in front of him, and began speaking to him.

"You're first case, huh? Be careful...there are a few who've lost their sanity to the judge in there," she said warningly.

"Wh-wh...wh-wh-wh...Wha...WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT," yelled out Phoenix, surprised that the judge could actually be stupid.

"SUICIDE IS THE ONLY PATH FOR ME! It's over, I say! OVEEEEER!" shrieked Larry Butz, the defendant.

"Uh...Phoenix...who is that guy?" asked Mia.

"Oh..right...I know him...he's..." Phoenix began. Then everything except Larry and Mia turned into blackness and three boxes appeared. He poked the top one, which read "Mia Fey."

"Phoenix, I'M MIA FEY!" shouted Mia.

"Wh-wh-wh-WHAAAAAAAAAT!?" asked Phoenix.

"Uh...why is this news to you?" asked Mia.

Then he poked the one saying Larry, mainly because the other one read "Cat Stuck in Tree."

"That's his name?" asked Mia.

"Wh-wh-WHERE DO YOU GET THIS INFO!?" yelled Phoenix.

"Uh...you just poked the box?"

"Oh...right...well...I'd better be getting to court! Heh...heh..."

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_10:00 AM, Court Room No. 2_

Everyone then entered the court. A silence dawned over it.

"Uh...the defense is ready your honor..." began Phoenix.

"Oh...uh...right...OOOOHHHH!" the judge exclaimed, rather confused. "Is the defense ready? HUH!? IS YOU READY, FINKRAT!?"

"Um...oh...y-y-yes, your honor..." replied Phoenix.

"I HEARD STUTTERING! THIS MEANS YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON!" exclaimed the judge again.

"N-n-NO! You're just freaking me ou-"

"INCREDIBLY OBVIOUS QUESTIONS! SOLVE THEM OR I'LL EXPLODE ONE OF YOUR EXCLAIMATION POINTS!"

"N-N-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I'll answer them!"

"Alright, how many states are there?" asked the judge. The music then stopped and a loud "OBJECTION" was heard, Phoenix smirking.

"That's a trick question, your honor!" yelled Phoenix. "There are 50 U.S. states, but also 193 political states recognized by the UN! This is clearly a contradiction!"

"OBJECTION!" yelled out Prosecutor Payne. "There are only 192 members of the UN!"

"OBJECTION!" replied Phoenix. "Vatican City is actually recognized, but isn't a member!"

The judge pounded his gavel. "Alright, now I have but one more question before I end this trial, Mr. Wright."

"Yes, your honor?"

"What is my age?"

"Um...uh...OBJECTION! CHINA HAS THE HIGHEST POPULATION!"

"Very valid point, Mr. Wright. We thus find Vatican City, NOT GUILTY! Oh...and your friend is free to go too."

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_CASE 1_

_THE FIRST TURNABOUT_

_THE END_


	2. Case 2, Investigation Day 1

The characters and simplified law system of the Ace Attorney series is not owned by me, and this story is a parody of the first game. If you do not like this, I advise you leave. Please keep in mind that I'm a fan of the series, so try not to take this seriously. This message will be copied in every chapter for my own convenience.

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_CASE 2! That's all I have to say..._

_-----_

_"HELLO SIS! WHY WON'T YOU CALL MORE!?" yelled out Maya Fey into her phone._

_"Um...because I'm a busy Defense Attorney in a land filled with three-day long murder cases in which I must spend whole days investigating?" replied the voice of Mia Fey._

_"I guess I'll buy that. Then resale it." said Maya._

_"I WILL SUE YOU!"_

_"Then will you be my attorney?"_

_"Uh...yeah..." said Mia, trying to avoid the obvious fact that she can't do that and make sense at the same time. Just like the time she tried to balance a plate on one hand and jump on a trampoline at the same time. The sharp and very painful memories, they were. Just before Mia could go into a flash back, Maya interrupted again._

_"THANK YOU SIS! I'll pick up that evidence from you right away!"_

_"Wait...I didn't tell you that, yet!" she replied._

_-----_

_Later..._

_"I'm sorry that you won't give me those papers, Ms. Fey...now to kill you." said a voice._

_"Ugh...if I'm gonna die, I'll do it patriotic style! Red...white...blue..." replied Mia Fey._

_-----_

_9:08 PM, Fey & Co. Offices_

"UGH! IT SMELLS LIKE BLOOD IN THIS DUMP...er...CRIB, YO!" yelled Phoenix as he walked into the Fey & Co. Offices. "It must be my homie...er...whatever...the person who died. Cheif!" Then Phoenix went into the room where Mia had died, and saw Maya sitting there, crying.

"U kild teh Mia Feh! FTW! OMG!" yelled Phoenix at Maya. There was a pause. "Wait! You couldn't have killed her! You aren't laughing like a maniac!" Then the detective came.

"I KNOW YOU!" shouted Phoenix as he came in. "YOU'RE EDGEWORTH!"

"Uh...no...the name's Gumshoe!"

"OBJECTION!"

"Uh...no, seriously...MAYA IS UNDER ARREST, PAL!"

Maya was then taken away.

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_9:07 AM, Deten-BOOM! The time and location counter was destroyed! Would you like to send out another Pokemon?_

"Um...yeah..." began Phoenix, facing towards Maya. "Pretty...gnarly being confined to the waves of...uh...crime without a surfboard...of truth!"

"Yeah, it's truly more horrible than you can imagine..." replied Maya.

"Gnarly, dudete, all...radical and...cribs! Goo goo, gah gah!"

"Uh...you just went back into your gansta' thing. HAMBURGERS, YUM!"

"WH-WH-WHAAAAAAAAAAAT!?"

"Yes...CHEESE! CHEESEBURGER NAO!"

"Huh? I ain't seein' no cow n' cheese down'n these here parts, pardner."

"This conversation is going nowhere."

"True...true...I'LL BE YOUR LAWYER!"

"No, you fat pig! I WANT GROSSBERG TO BE MY ATTORNEY!"

"Isn't he even MORE of a fat pig?"

"I don't really know OR CARE! Go to his law offices!"

"Okay...whatever you say..."

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Phoenix arrived at Grossberg's law offices to find no one.

"WH-WH-WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" he picked up a picture which read

"DL-6." "Uh...I'm sure I'll be seeing something like this in the future...anyway...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?"

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"OOH! I remember this place!" exclaimed Phoenix as he arrived at Fey & Co. Law Offices. "OOH! It's Miles Prower!"

"What are you, Sonic the Hedgehog or something, pal?" asked Detective Gumshoe.

"Right...um...how're you?"

"Good, pal. And you?"

"I'm doing well...hmm...say...maybe you have a cell phone I can borrow, hmm? MAYA FEY'S CELL PHONE NAO!"

"Uh...sorry. I can't provide you with that pal."

"I'LL GIVE YOU PIE!" As they exchanged, Gumshoe realized a piece of paper with 100 digits of pi. As he ran out, Gumshoe shouted.

"THIS...ISN'T...MY...PIE!!!"

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Phoenix then walked into the Gatewater Hotel, only to meet up with April May...whoever she was...

"WHY AM I HERE!?"

"I called the police and witnessed the crime."

"WHY DO YOU EXPECT ME TO KNOW THIS!?" he ran back to the Detention Center in horror.

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"Alright...is Grossberg my lawyer?" asked Maya.

"Actually, he wasn't even there. But I got your phone back." replied Phoenix.

"Okay...thank you...uh..."

"VOICES FROM THE NETHERLANDS!"

"Huh? I just want a hamburger."

"I want tacos."

"NO! HAMBURGERS!"

"You have a very persuasive...loud...voice."

"THANK YOU!"

"Anyway...I'll check if Grossberg is back."

"BUT IT HASN'T even _been _fiy...mnnmn" Maya's voice turned to a blur as Phoenix ran away."

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"Ahem...hello...ahem-cough-ahem-achoo." said Grossberg. "Maya is stinky, loud, not to men-cough-ahem...mention annoying and burger obsessed. NO! I WILL NOT ACCEPT SUCH...cough-cough-achoo...SUCH A CASE!"

"Thanks Grossberg! You are very helpful ALL THE TIME! YOU **NEVER** ARE SELFISH OR GREEDY OR REFUSE TO ACCEPT A CASE OF SOMEONE WHO'S CLEARLY INNOCENT!" exclaimed Phoenix.

"But it's too hard...cough-cough-achoo...ahem...AND I DON'T WANT TO LOSE A CASE! OTHERWISE MY REPUTATION WILL BE IN JEOPARDY." Jeopardy! music then began playing. After it ended, Phoenix walked out, grumbling.

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Phoenix walked into the Detention Center, annoyed.

"What do you mean he won't take my case!?" yelled Maya.

"Uh...are you some kind of mind reader?" asked Phoenix.

"I CAN READ THE BLUE TEXT IN PARENTHESIS, YOU KNOW!"

"Ugh...I'll take your case."

"REALLY!? REALLY!? Reallyreallyreallyreallyrea..."

"YES!"

"Oh...well...thank you then."

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	3. THE STARTING CONCLUSION

Phoenix Wright entered the trial and defeated miles edgeworth in a battle of wits because Miles logic could not defeat Fenies JAMS and he had arrested Red White in no time, and prevented the murder of Mia, and as he looked out he saw a brand new day where he could work with mia and maya to defeat cases like those of Will Powers and Miles Edgeworth easily through the use of friendship. They had done this and arrested Manfred von Karma but then Manfred killed Mia Fey

"This is my future" said Phoenix wright

"No this is" said Miles and showed him a pic of Apollo Justice Ace Attorney video game

"NOOOOOO" but actually when he played it it was ok, but he still wanted to be a star

"NOOOOGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGH" "NGHOOOOOO" "NOOOOOOOOO" "NGGGGHHHHOOOOOO" alternated Phoenix and Miles but then MIles realized he had his own game that trumped Apollo

"HERE IS THE PLAN PHOENIX I WILL DEFEAT APOLLO JUSTICES GAME" and apollo justice seemed not to get another game again. But Miles never gave back the game glory to Phoenix. He was basking in ladies and moneys. And he became even more smuggish and less logical and could not be in another game.

"I ONLY GET TWO WHILE PHOENIX GETS THREEEEE"

Apollo only get one :(

"How come i only get one game" said Apollo sadly

"Because apollo my good friend you are not a good attorney" said Phoenix

"well you got no more badge so who are you to say"

"only the jury knows apollo only the jury knows" said Phoenix

And jury said Red White was not so guilty

"DAMMMMMMMMMMMMM"


End file.
